Battered and Bruised

I am in Taipei for nine days or so. Today was my one weekend day, and a friend and I checked out a spa nearby the hotel for a little sauna and massage action. It all started well, with a nice shower and steam room, followed by some lounging around in a comfortable chair with healthy snacks and a Vogue. There was a lot of nudity, which kind of weirded little ol' American-me out a bit. It was a women's only spa, and they all jumped in the communal baths naked as jaybirds.

But I digress. This story is about the Chinese-style massage, the one that made me almost cry for 90 minutes straight. The massage that hit every single nerve in my entire body. The one where I had to ask a "little" less pressure THREE times.

I should have known better. Chinese massages in China are rough affairs, so I avoid them in Shanghai and Beijing. I was thinking maybe they would be a little westernized here in Taipei. But no. Amber, the masseuse, even took great pride in telling me that she studied for two years in China.

Just for the record, I am not a baby. I like strong massages, unlike my husband. His perfect massage would involve no pressure at all, only a feather. But this - this was a sumo wrestler on steroids. I hurt way more now than I did going into the spa. At least I won't get breast cancer now, though. That's what Amber told me, anyway.